Today.. I’m going to lose my best friend…. I just made the call.. the call that I never wanted to make… but I wanted to make sure that Dr. Plater, his vet, was going to be there for him… I’m going to take his blanket… and his squeaky.. they have to go with him.. they have to.
My sweet pup Franklin did not have a good day yesterday.. or last night… he has gotten to the point where he goes 5-6 hops and then he is wheezing bad…. Nothing stops the wheezing.. I wish I could stop the wheezing… It hurts to see him wheezing so much… gawd, you know.. I think I have cried more over this sweet soldier of mine than I have my own parents!!
Last night I had to finish making some soap in the kitchen and he would not leave my side.. he had to lie beside me.. so I brought one of the dog beds in and his blanket and he lay there… while I finished up.. If I left the kitchen.. he would follow me… I went into the tv room for a bit.. and he snuggled on the couch.. and then when I got up.. he did too…. He clung to me .. he’s a mama’s boy… he’s my handsome boy….
My sweetie Fred was just beside himself… he wishes he could go another day… he says.. let’s see how he is in the morning… I just smiled and hugged him cause I know he is hoping for just one more day… one more pet on the head.. one more tail wag in the morning for a treat.
We hugged and he said.. “this is it.. isn’t it?” Yup.. it is.. There were many tears last night… many kleenex’s used…
Last night I took the mattress down off the bed… and we all slept on the floor. I gave him an extra pain pill and an extra bit of cough syrup for his throat. We had a few moments through the night.. and then he settled down a bit more.. Maggie was weird though. Kinda made me think how pack animals act when they know there is a weak one. Franklin was lying on the mattress.. and she came and laid down.. right on top of his head!! And he didn’t move!! I thought.. WTF?? So I moved her.. and she got piffed at me and got down off the mattress and slept beside it… No way was she coming back up… lol
So, I took the day off today… I called into my work and told them I would not be in.. My sweetie said.. “look.. his tail is wagging, he’s ok. Let’s wait one more day… ” If I had one more day with him… that would be just for our own selfishness… and I would regret it. Seeing him wheezing and struggling just so that we had one more day. Nope.
My hubby went into work for the morning and he will be home at lunch time.. We are going to take Franklin for some ice cream… Maggie too. and then we are going to drive down to the vets with all the windows open so that sweet boy of mine can stick his head out the window and lets those ears fly!!
The ride home will be heartbreaking…
F*U*C*K this hurts… yes.. I know.. I swore.. I’m sorry.. but I just had to type it once. Actually, I typed it more than that but I used the backspace button a few times…. It hurts to see cancer win… in anyone two legged and four, or three. It hurts to see his tail wag a bit less… it hurts to see him lying on his bed looking at me with dull eyes… it hurts knowing how empty the house will be when we get home..
I will miss him terribly… Actually.. I’ve been missing him for a few days now… he just has not been himself.. I believe he is telling me he is tired…
Like I said before, please send a message to all those beautiful tripawds and four leggers at the bridge that Franklin is coming.. they will know him when they see him. He’s the happy one with the tail wagging and the grin on his face… he hasn’t met a dog or cat he hasn’t liked.. so tell them not to be scared… he is just a big goofball. And if there is a squirrel chase going on.. he’ll be right in the thick of it… I know he’ll be snuggling with his sleeping buddy Diesel tonight… so all will be well…
of course, I can’t leave without some pictures……
bark atcha later…..